This is something I'm in sort supply of. I admit it - I really like instant gratification. I hate surprises and I don't want to wait. One of the things that's hard for me in terms of program is that I need to wait for the weight to melt off. I'm in program to find spiritual progress and fight the disease of compulsive eating not to lose weight. The weight loss is just a side effect of become spiritually healthy. That's the hard part - I feel like I'm taking the steps so the weight should just go away. It took me over 40 years to gain all this weight I need to be patient and let the program make the changes in my life that need to happen and then over time the weight will go down to a healthy number.
Honestly, I barely have the patience to sit here and write this post. I just want it to be done so I can go on to the next thing in my life. What a waste.....I'm missing out on so much not letting myself enjoy each moment as it happens. I have very little patience considering I'm someone who's goal is to live in the moment. Now that is the goal - it's something I work toward not something I'm already good at.
Right now in this moment I'm sitting on my futon, writing this post on my laptop while my daughter watches Netflix and my son hangs out in his room. All in all a typical Tuesday morning. I don't have anything especially pressing for the rest of the day - some reading with the girl, working in my art journal and maybe some writing later in the day. I'm not feeling overwhelming drive to do any of these things, yet I feel like I need to hurry and get this done so I can move on to other things. It's weird....it's really just a lack of patience in my life.
So for today - One Day At A Time - I ask my Higher Power to help me with patience - grant me patience to take my day one moment at a time.