an ending = a new beginning

Well yesterday was a momentous day - I graduated from therapy! I've been in therapy for over 2 years and I've done a lot of hard work learning about myself and learning how to utilize tools that can help me in my journey. The time has come to move on and use those tools myself.

I'm feeling really proud of myself (I can do that now). I've worked hard for this moment and I've grown and healed so much over the last few years. I've weathered challenges that I would never wish on my worst enemy and I've come through stronger wiser and more loving.

I've learned that I'm not as bad a person as I feared I was. As a matter of fact I'm a pretty good person. I'm an amazing person and my only identity is not that of wife and mother. I'm a fully realized complete being of light and love. I can see that now thanks to the work I did with my wonderful therapist.

Does this mean I've arrived? No way - I still have stuff to work on, but that's what life is about. It means I've graduated to doing the work on my own, utilizing the tools my therapist helped me discover. She was an amazing help to me and really supported me and my goals as I worked through things in my life, but it's time to move on.

Through this part of my journey, I've learned to mourn appropriately, to stop blaming myself for other's mistakes, to take a breath before reacting, to let go of my anger, and to love myself. All were wonderful lessons, but there is more for me. I'm working on learning to trust - this is still a big one for me and I'm still learning to reach out to others outside of my immediate family. I'm also still working on trying not to seek approval outside myself - to be enough.

The time has come to stand on my own. I'm ready. Bring it on!!